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Lawyer Jokes

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21. Christopher Exley: Using bad science to demonize aluminum adjuvants in vaccines

weighed myself three times, and got readings of 180, 180, 182, I’d say “My scale isn’t as accurate as it might be, but I probably weigh around 181.” If I weighed my cat three times, and got readings of 10, 12, and 150, I’d say “My scale must be broken.” I wouldn’t say “My cat weighs around 50 pounds.” Taking the median of three measurements, supposedly of the same value, that aren’t even within an oder of magnitude of each other, sounds more like a joke than like credible research. Accuracy

2017 Respectful Insolence

22. The Mayor of Algonac responds to a hepatitis A outbreak by promoting antivaccine pseudoscience

it. My doctor didn’t have it, couldn’t get it in time, and trying to get it from the public health department was a joke; the person I needed to talk to was only in the office two days a week for two hours, and never answered the phone. It was very frustrating. Granted, that happened in North Carolina. I hope you have better luck in Michigan. If you’re still performing surgeries, I’d say do it. JustaTech I work with a lot of human blood so I thought it would be a good idea to get the Hep A series (...) “Steve Newell showed up one evening with a friend, a lawyer named Frank Green, whom Steve had convinced to try acid as a possible cure for his psychopathological disorders. Throughout his trip Frank blubbered about his ex-wife. She had recently divorced him, getting custody of their only child and denying Frank any visiting rights. He rolled around on the floor in front of the couch on which Sally was sitting, moaning and groaning and occasionally addressing Sally by his first wife’s name. “Sally, he

2017 Respectful Insolence

23. Conflicts of interest in health care journalism. Who’s watching the watchdogs? We are. Part 1 of 3

month published . JAMA included a Viewpoint article entitled, “ ” The first line: “Preservation of trust is the essential purpose of policies about conflict of interest.” But who talks about conflicts of interest in health care journalism? In a Gallup poll, “ ,” respondents rated journalists’ honesty and ethical standards below psychiatrists, chiropractors and bankers….and just above lawyers. There is great potential harm in a further erosion of trust in journalism and in health care (...) it is for @PhRMA to pay their bills and salaries” and “Is this a joke? Do you not see how this kills any credibility you might have with health journalism? @PhRMA is a powerful lobby.” NPR lists PhRMA as a supporter. This October the World Conference of Science Journalists will meet in San Francisco, . Johnson & Johnson is currently the top donor, at $400,000 . Bayer gave at least $50,000. Nearly a half million just from two drug companies. It would require a much longer piece to outline ethical issues

2017 HealthNewsReview

24. False balance in reporting the case of a local mother jailed for contempt of court for reneging on an agreement to vaccinate her child

time has passed for him to bring your son's vaccinations up to date as rapidly as medically necessary, which is the language in the order." . Judge then instructs Dad to pick up child at school and to set up the vaccinations per the order. She sets a status update hearing in a week. Mom starts to whine and discuss and judge shuts her down. "No. I'm done here." Mom's lawyer tries to raise an objection and judge shuts him down... "MR. VITALE, WE ARE DONE HERE." . It seems the judge doesn't like (...) comments By on 08 Oct 2017 In reply to by gary bredow (not verified) to post comments By Epsilon (not verified) on 08 Oct 2017 She's also terrible at math. Date range 01/01/2006 - 12/31/2015 (379/2,845,946,816)(100) = ? (2,824/2,845,946,816)(100) = ? Any particular reason she's sitting in the Oakland County jail under her maiden name, rather than Bredow? I did get my flu shot last week, thanks. I get one every year. I'm also planning on getting vaccinated against shingles as it's no joke. A family

2017 Respectful Insolence

26. Medical Emergencies On Airplanes: Should Doctors “Heed The Call”?

needed a joke for a speech he was giving, Larry refused to heed the comedian call. How do you feel? Should physicians heed the call in the air? Airobatically Yours, -ACP Share this: Like this: Like Loading... Related Post navigation 10 thoughts on “Medical Emergencies On Airplanes: Should Doctors “Heed The Call”?” Some of the airlines have instituted an in-house physician phone consult for in-flight medical emergencies; usually though they hand the phone to whomever has offered to help; works ok (...) … It’s not like we’re asking for first class … Or monetary compensation. I think only medical people and lawyers truly get this issue. I assume Joe (or Joanna) public thinks we as medical professionals need to pony up in a heartbeat. And yep, flight attendants should have provider CPR and first aid at the very least! As a nurse I would probably step up if I needed to and there wasn’t another medical professional already handling the situation. I guess I’d bite the bullet, take it for a ride and do

2018 The Skeptical Cardiologist

27. Care but don’t touch: Being wise in the modern era

: patient benefit. In contrast to non-medical relationships, physicians owe a legally cognizable fiduciary duty towards patients: trust. And physicians exert power and control with patients. Patients are vulnerable. To show affection that does not advance patient care may create a serious problem. Idle, “smart-aleck,” facetious, poor taste puns and jokes, innocent as uttered — look out. Do not tell patients off-color stories or jokes or personal intimate stories. Edward Berk, MD, at the University (...) pictures with a depiction of social conduct: avoid. If you would be hesitant to explain the episode to colleagues or to lawyers, or you are hesitant to write the exact details in your chart, don’t do it. Always consider how conduct will spin on the front page of the New York Times or on CNN or Fox, and hope that you never land there. Elliott Oppenheim is a heath care attorney and author of . Image credit: … … 88 Shares Tagged as: , Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story! Get free updates delivered

2018 KevinMD blog

28. Patient Modesty: Volume 89

communities people don’t run to the emergency room when they have a runny nose. I’ve worked in those small rural hospitals and once knew an old timer physician that was so old that the state took his drivers license away due to his poor vision. It didn’t stop him from working, he walked to the hospital and did house calls, on foot. Come to large cities like Phoenix or Houston and you will find 4 urgent care centers in one square mile. I call urgent care centers Quack in a Shack. What a joke! With my

2018 Bioethics Discussion Blog

29. Structured settlements are ruining patients’ lives

damage. Almost as a joke, I said: “And you will make sure my daughter gets sent to the best psychiatrists ?” “Oh yes,” the girl said. “We can make sure your daughter gets help even if it takes years !” I was stunned. Even if my daughter got the “help” and she got her “large cash settlement” what about the rest of her life? Would she able to get a job or even go to college with a record of being under psychiatric care for years? I politely said, ” No thanks.” And instead encouraged my daughter to get (...) as to whether or not the claim was legitimate. I was hired by an independent company and asked to be blinded as to whether or not the IME was requested by the plaintiff or defendant side. By this time, it was months or even years after the event, both sides were heavily lawyered up, and the patient was out of work for a long time. Ninety-five percent of what I did was auto accident related, and the patient was either the driver, passenger, pedestrian or people in other vehicles involved in the accident. So

2018 KevinMD blog

31. The consequences of taking patients at their word

we thought was best. But in the age of “patient satisfaction” and “the patient being the captain of their health care ship,” we as physicians have been forced just to take patients at their word, and that has had consequences. The opioid crisis is just one example. Just accepting that a patient’s pain is “10/10” has not worked out well. There is also the issue of secondary gain, such as dealing with workers compensation, auto accidents or pretty much any time a lawyer is involved. Should (...) physicians take patients at their word or ask questions to verify? I am reminded of an old joke: What’s the difference between an orthopedist and a carpenter? The carpenter knows more than two antibiotics. As an orthopedist, I freely admit that 98 percent of the time when we pick an antibiotic we use a cephalosporin both for treatment and for surgical prophylaxis. Early on in my career, I noticed that there was an inordinate number of patients who claimed they were allergic to penicillin

2018 KevinMD blog

32. Patient Dignity (Formerly: Patient Modesty): Volume 92

. This is problematic, one a plaintiffs lawyer would easily seize on. “How do you know what an appropriate exam is, what is your training for conducting this exam?” “Do you stay in the room the entire time or are you asked to leave for various reasons?” “Who do you report suspicions too, what is the policy for reporting and to whom do you report?” “Do you document your observation or does the provider do that?” etc. Certainly small practices will not be able to or bother with providing chaperone training and having (...) approach would be successful by itself. This was the first time that this garment was being used; and, I wasn't sure how well a novel approach would be accepted by hospital personnel. Possibly, I was the topic of discussions, protocol meetings or jokes. I don't know. Throughout the entire process I was not hostile nor belligerent. I tried to politely "nail everything down" before the operation day. Nevertheless, my son and I were ready to pull the iv and walk (hobble) in the event of a last minute

2018 Bioethics Discussion Blog

35. Patient Modesty: Volume 78

for the goose is good for the gander. I'm not a lawyer but I know you can not discriminate against either sex in a straight forward manner. To respond "you are not a woman" is all an American Civil Liberties attorney would need to make something out of this. Have any of those posting here, who are being denied equal rights to medical privacy/modesty, attempted to do this? MER, have you sent highlights of your extensive and well organized research to any legal body for an evaluation? So my question (...) up for their rights. Lawyers need to take this issue seriously and be willing to take on the system to help enact change that is long over due. Our criminal justice system must stop looking at female healthcare personnel as defenseless girls and start seeing them for the predators that they are. They've started seeing female teachers in a different eye and when they catch a predator preying on a male student, they've started handing out prison sentences instead of just probation like they have

2017 Bioethics Discussion Blog

36. When the next big outbreaks happen, they’ll probably happen in Texas

, who is a rock star among antivaccine activists. Sometimes they ; sometimes they ; sometimes they . (OK, Wakefield and his fellow travelers only met with Trump once, but .) I just want to emphasize, though, that this : Meanwhile, a PAC named Texans for Vaccine Choice has sprung up after state Representative Jason Villalba, a Republican lawyer from Dallas, proposed scrapping nonmedical exemptions last year. (The Texas House of Representatives voted down the bill.) “While they do not have a whole lot (...) better suited. * TINU. to post comments By Narad (not verified) on 03 Dec 2016 to post comments By Mrs Woo (not verified) on 03 Dec 2016 to post comments By Narad (not verified) on 03 Dec 2016 . _____ I wasn't going to ask JustaTech to go watch the movie just to explain Gilbert's joke. Cosmic coincidence...? The Red Lectroids seem to have invaded the "Bogus Internet Survey" thread @ comment #139... to post comments By sadmar (not verified) on 03 Dec 2016 to post comments By Politicalguineapig

2016 Respectful Insolence

37. Patient Modesty: Volume 81

state of affairs we are in. What I find most disgusting and distressing about the "Denver 5" episode is most people view it as being funny. What should have been a wake up call to the public is just a joke. Sad. I understand the next of kin was notified of the episode. I hope they sue the pants of the hospital & the 5 degenerates. Regards, NTT At , Anonymous said... Hello again, In my original note to Ms Jackson, I yellow highlighted the "3 weeks" and "return to work". Unfortunately, this site

2017 Bioethics Discussion Blog

38. Patient Modesty: Volume 80

, the patient would need to write something along these lines on any and all consent forms they sign. "I hereby do NOT consent to any observers of any age or sex observing any preparations, testing, and/or treatment(s) done on my person at any time while I am a patient at this facility." It's getting to be you have to take a lawyer along with you if you want to protect your wishes. Sad. I've also been speaking to local urologists & a few urology depts. To a person not one of the doctors and staff I spoke

2017 Bioethics Discussion Blog

39. A doctor’s place is in the exam room

A doctor’s place is in the exam room A doctor's place is in the exam room A doctor’s place is in the exam room | | June 27, 2017 101 Shares An orthopedic surgeon and a neurosurgeon walk into a room … Unfortunately, this is not the start of a joke. While we would prefer to be sharing best practices and treating patients in our exam rooms, the fact is we’re spending more time than we’d like in a courtroom. Because our medical liability system is broken, orthopedic surgeons, neurosurgeons, OB-GYNs (...) , for the filing of a claim. All of us in the physician community continue to fight an uphill battle against the only people who do benefit from a broken system — personal injury lawyers. At the expense of patients, they continue to pursue “jackpot justice” with lawsuits that lack merit and make the system inefficient for those deserving compensation. We can find a cure by including proven reforms — such as those encompassed in H.R. 1215 and H.R. 1704 — in health care reform legislation under consideration

2017 KevinMD blog

40. Patient Modesty: Volume 79

a colonoscopy without sedation was a total non-event, I will admit that swallowing the ultrasound device for the TEE was not easy or pleasant. Once it was all the way in it wasn't a big deal. Taking it out was a little tough but it comes out much faster than it goes in. Initially it was just me and the two nurses (female) and then the tech (female) came in to get the equipment set up. The older nurse then tells the tech that I won't be sedated so we can't be talking about how cute he is. She was joking (...) largest hospital in the State. I would think they'd be more efficient cost-wise than what I experienced. Again, I know the nurse was just joking about talking about me. It is just that such a comment carries with it the proverbial grain of truth that they do talk. At , Anonymous said... Hello Renee, Is there a reason that your doctors don't seem to elaborate on your condition IN PLAIN ENGLISH w/o the medicaleze? At your subsequent meetings, please ask all medical personnel to discussion your situation

2017 Bioethics Discussion Blog

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